Recently, I went to a friend's wedding. Which really felt a bit like going to a junior prom xD but I suppose that's what happens when kids get married. They're 20 and 22, and have no plan lined up for when they come back from their week-long honeymoon in freaking New Zealand.
*sigh* we all thought this wedding was going to be a train wreck. Why? Because it wasn't supposed to have happened for another year and a half or so! They had to save and plan of that course of time--but then I guess Kody got a wild hair up his ass and decided "let's get married, since I'm joining the airforce later!" .....he hasn't even taken the ASVAB. *face palm* STILL, hasn't, mind you. And when they come back--THEN they will be looking for an apartment...and a bunch of other little things. no organization nor communication whatsoever.
I wasn't apart of the bridal party, but because they're my family I was back their with the bridesmaids helping as if I were in it. For example, putting make up on one of the girls who APPARENTLY has never applied anything of the sort to herself. Really? >_> and thus I began teaching 'open canvas'. Because who on God's green earth scrunches their eyes when applying eye shadow? OPEN. UP. I can't get the foam pad in their even with 'resting bitch face' D:< did she WANT me to dig in her damn eyes?! -_____-
then there was another challenge: the flower girl.
her mother was there the entire time and was literally no help at all to her own daughter. I couldn't help but wonder "what the fuck, lady?" when she asked other people to curl her daughter's hair for her. All the women in that damn room and it's got to be the one who only ever held a curling iron ONCE. And that went horrible-- nothing burned, but it was a smooth curl up until the awkward 90degree KINK in the curl and everything after sort of fell straight. If I can't make ONE curl on MY head, what the hell am I going to do with this little girl?!
We got our chance to be in the bathroom with the curling iron. She was....very frail, in appearance. And her hair was so soft and THIN! I had to put a good chunk of hair in the curling iron just so it wouldn't fall out of the clamp.....even though I had no idea what I was doing. But I couldn't let her find that out. Children can smell fear.
me: *pretending to know what I'm doing*
Kimberly: *no expression*
me: ....so, how come you wont let mommy curl your hair?
internal me: please lord don't let me fuck up this kid's hair.
me: ....does she do it at home?
Kimberly:....we don't own one at home.
me: oh. well that's okay, hun. I'm going to make you star~!
I was VERY careful with her hair. The last thing I need is for something like this to happen--> www.youtube.com/watch?v=LdVuSv…
<--- yeah. no. (god bless you, tori, haha xD)
and then have to deal with the mother's wrath of burning her kids hair to a burnt crisp x___x hell NOPE.
I tried thinking "what would my mother do"? and was careful to not completely mirror her techniques from just getting me ready for Sunday school (i.e., poking me in the eye with her thumbnail, coming close to burning my scalp, etc.) and.....it came out good! I gave it that right kind of flower girl flounce and the mother even approved of it--greatly;; so....YEAH! GO ME!
at the reception...I think that's when things were kind of put into perspective for me. The crazy died out and the reality sort of set in as fefe was making her speech.
"people often asked me, over the entire course of us getting this put together, 'how do you feel about your LITTLE SISTER getting married before YOU?' and I thought 'wow, that's a rude thing to say.' but you know what? That's a different thing. Sure, I graduated first, went to college first, and got my 'big girl' job first....but that all comes with age. Love, isn't the same thing. That's the one thing that should never be a race among siblings. It doesn't matter who 'gets there' first when it comes to finding the one you love--because that happens with time, and just simply happens when it's meant to. And I couldn't be happier for my sister for finding the one she wants to be with."
...it really spoke to me. and I could tell it hit home with our other friends as I looked around the room and saw the same knowing smiles unfurl as we each held out champagne glasses a little tighter. Well said, fefe.
And then the first dance as husband and wife. I don't remember what song they used, but I do remember seeing them on that small dance floor together, both of them fitting so well against the other and that look of REAL love between them. How she held him, how he looked at her....everyone in that room saw the love, and it was beautiful. I almost want to say it's the same love as I've seen in my parents.
it's like that classic hallmark feel of "we don't have a plan, we just fell in love!" because even though this wedding got so much flack for being unorganized, rushed, and even questioned, we all came together and quietly accepted that this was love, and no one can do anything about it; these two crazies did it.
I sat at a table there, watching them and the kids playing around them with balloons. Myself, Felicia, keith and his new girlfriend, Aaron on crutches, Emily, and Andrea. Amongst conversation and laughter I sort of just looked at our situation and began a small and silent reflection of where WE are.
Shannah and Kody got married today.
Felicia is living in Arizona with her significant other.
Keith did some growing up and found himself a girlfriend that we DON'T hate.
Aaron is reminiscing his long history of mentoring the boy scouts.
Andrea and Emily are both still going to Adams State.
....I couldn't help but wonder: what do I have to bring to the table aside from school?
It wasn't in a negative way, of course. Sure, I'm single, going to Angelo State, living with family...but you know what, I'm going forward. Not everyone has things right away, I get that. It's a given. I've got a to do list!
School is still a major key right now. I suppose I can date in college, though. I could change that, if I had any takers.
that said, I'd like to announce I'm officially over Bee, haha. We really are better as friends. I find that NOW I can be myself around her, because the stress and pressure of her 'judgment' is gone. As in, I don't have to work to impress or entertain, I just be me. And honestly, I think I make her laugh more now than I did before. Who knew not having a filter would improve that?
Yeah yeah, "always be yourself" but there's that pause you give yourself and you wonder "how MUCH is TOO MUCH?" because you never thinks that with friends, do you? Nope. You go with the flow because you know the limits and what not to say around certain people--if you keep that in mind, you'll go far. I still love her very much, but it's just a different kind of love now.
I also still like to tease her about things, and she just shakes a fist at me when I laugh. but then she laughs, too. Especially about my dumb luck.
me: so you know those 50 cent things the kids get from the machines at Hastings?
me: well they had horror movie classics last I was there, so I went and got one.
bee: *rolls eyes*
me: it was Hannibal Lector. BUT, it wasn't a sticker. Otherwise I was going to give it to Jonny to put on his laptop or something.
me: it was a freaking TATTOO.
bee: *stares/laughs* ?!
me: not even in a cool pose or nothing, just a forward profile. a freaking HEAD SHOT.
bee: *laughing her ass off* wh--what!! what!!! XD
the most random god damned tattoo I ever held. And now, idk where it went! ;A;
but yeah. It stopped stinging for me after I came to terms with it OFFICIALLY. I figure that so long as I can see her smile and hear her laugh, I'm good.
however she's a horrible texter, and so I bombarded her with random shit. gifs and pics that make no sense. bad puns. it's beautiful. I may even upload ONE just so I can giggle at it now and then.
only because I can hear her in her text frustration at my bullshit xD
Well, wish I could type more, but I've gotta jet.
I'm late for a luncheon at the much favored Vietnamese restaurant Alanna and I hit up.
1) what song would you open your reception up with?
2) any ideas for a "couple's first dance" song?
3) do you find that some people are better as friends than girlfriends/boyfriends?